Dealing with your Toddler’s Nighttime Fears!
Author: Stef Daniel
If the boogey man lives under your child's bed, chances are you are dealing with some nighttime fears that may be a gentle mix of separation anxiety and fear of the dark. It is only natural for children to reach a point in their maturity where they begin reliving or thinking about things they witness in their life and worrying about it. Even the Halloween Dora or Blue's Clues can offer enough stimulation for a child to be afraid and while it may be annoying that they don't want to go to sleep on time, it should be dealt with compassionately.
One great way to help children get over this is to sit and read with them. Many parents read in the living room before bed and then have their children go to sleep like big kids. If you can take the book in their room, read by the light of a night light, and make them comfortable and cozy, they may tire so quickly that they won't have time to invent tales about goblins or the boogey man. If they do, show them that there is nothing there! Open the closets, look under the bed together, open toy boxes, and investigate other areas that may be causing the problem. Never dismiss the toddler as making excuses, especially in the beginning.
Leave a light on. One great thing to do for young children is to use the stick up lights so they have a trail to your room should they need it. This will make them feel safe and know that they can get to you quickly should the need arise. Leave doors open if it makes them feel better.
Using white noise in the way of an air cleaner or fan is another way to relax children. This drowns out many of the noises and creaks that houses make at night and subdues the mood in their bedroom, providing a very calming effect.
If the nighttime fears have a sudden onset, you may need to take a deeper look at what is going in your child's life. Just because they are toddlers doesn't mean that they can't or won't have things that bother them. Perhaps they are struggling at school or day care, or perhaps they are missing their parents. Talk to your children from a young age about what is bothering them so they will know that they always have someone to talk to.
Another way to help ease nighttime fears is to put them to bed a little later! Before you get thoroughly irritated with this one, read on! Parents get very used to a routine when it comes to bedtime and sleep habits. However, your children are growing and they will require less sleep as time goes on. If they are still taking a nap during the day, there is a good chance that when you lay them down to sleep, they are not completely tired. Try allowing them to stay up an hour longer and see if that solves the problem or eliminate the habit of the afternoon nap. Just because a sleep routine works for the parents, doesn't mean it will stay the same or work for the toddler. This definitely warrants serious consideration!
The last bit of advice is to handle the whole thing calmly without discipline. If you feel you are being manipulated then do a thorough check of the room to ease their fears, leave the door open, and then stick to your guns. They have to stay in bed. Even adults get afraid at night and if worse comes to worst and you feel your child is genuinely afraid, what is the harm of allowing them to fall asleep in your arms. While many parents are avidly against co-sleeping, you have to realize that they are only little once. In 12 years, you will wish you took advantage of all that snuggling. Moreover, if they can fall asleep in just a few minutes with you by their side, you can get up again and it is definitely worth your toddler not feeling anxious or afraid!
Children need their sleep at night! While each kid's personality will play a role in how well they behave at bedtime, parents should remain flexible in their sleeping terms and take the situation of nighttime fears seriously.
