Talkin’ Toddlers…Sometimes They Suck!
Author: Jeannie Fleming-Gifford
When they were an infant, the habit of using a pacifier or sucking a thumb was regarded as "oh so cute." Fast-forward a couple of years, and perhaps now you are thinking your child needs to ditch one of these habits.
Before you decide your toddler should go cold turkey, take a moment to stop and consider the situation. First of all, realize that most children will outgrow this type of habit on their own, usually by the age of 3 or 4 years. Do you have reason to be concerned about your child's desire to have a pacifier or to suck their thumb? For instance, do you think their language may be delayed because of this? Has your pediatrician or a first visit to a pediatric dentist revealed that the habit may be impacting the growth and positioning of your child's teeth?
Certainly, if you have had an expert talk with you about it being time to help your child abandon one or both of these habits, now is the time. However, if you are feeling pressure from family or friends, remember, each child grows and develops individually. Chances are, your child will give up this habit in due time.
If you aren't quite satisfied with that last sentence, here are a few things you can do to expedite the process of saying good-bye to thumb sucking or the pacifier:
- Set limits for your child. Does your child have their pacifier in their mouth all-day or only at rest time? Do you notice your child sucking their thumb during play, or just when they need comfort? Monitor the usage of your child's sucking habit and begin to set limits. Use kind and supportive words: "Wow - you are growing so big. As a big girl/boy, we're going to work on using our pacifier/thumb only at XYZ (define limit - could be rest time, or bed time, etc.). Of course, the use of a pacifier will make these limits easier to maintain. A thumb-sucking child may need more reminders.
- Enlist back up. If you've ever tried to break a habit, you know it's not easy. It may be even more difficult for your child as this habit may be providing them comfort and support. Your young child may not yet have the skills or resources to find another coping mechanism. This being the case, you and your child may need additional support to work through this situation. When saying "bye-bye" to a habit, get reinforcements from your partner, any siblings, your pediatrician, and others who may interact with your child. Make sure all are on the "same page" and providing a consistent, supportive message, as well as resources (other objects - i.e. a soft "lovie" for support, etc.).
- Supply an alternative. What other things can be used to provide comfort and support? These may include a beloved blankie, toy, or music, which can provide great distraction.
- Seek professional support. If it's not working, don't be disheartened. Many parents have worked through the same situations, some with success and others with stress! Pick up the phone and talk with your pediatrician. There are other supports and even some products that your local expert may be able to recommend.
